Tips for Managing Anxiety in Social Situations

Social anxiety is the fear or nervous feeling while being in social situations. These feelings stem from feeling unaccepted, unwanted or scrutinized. 

The triggers for this type of anxiety can stem from a few different things such as past experiences such as:

  • Being bullied
  • Past abused 
  • Negative social interactions

For others, social anxiety can stem from genetics. Meaning if a parent has social anxiety, the child can be susceptible to social anxiety through triggers. 

Coping with social anxiety can be crippling. Trying to live a life where you have to be social—whether it’s for family functions, schoolwork, or other situations—while not feeling comfortable or safe can be extremely frustrating. It can make those moments feel even more challenging.

Here are some tips on ways to manage your social anxiety to help make social interactions easier, or at least more tolerable.

Prepare

Before actually attending the social hour, beginning to prepare and wrap your mind around what is to come can make a large difference. 

Understand what the situation is, who is going to be there as well as what will be required of you. 

Making sure to go through the whole process in your head or on paper before attending the event will help you go through the motions or “practice” before so you feel more prepared. 

Not being prepared for a social event when you have social anxiety can feel a lot like a test or exam. You feel nervous, overstimulated and scared. Practicing beforehand can help to eliminate or at least soften the worries. 

Practice

When you had to practice presenting in front of the class in elementary school, did your teachers ever tell you to practice it in front of the mirror? Well, this technique can help with social anxiety too. 

If you’re attending an event focused on a certain topic or know the people there and what they like to talk about, taking time to practice conversation starters can help. Being ready with responses to potential questions can make you feel more prepared.

Some examples of things to talk about are:

  • The weather
  • New books or movies
  • Family interests
  • Sports
  • School/Work

A lot of the time it can help to start with an open ended question such as:

  • What was the highlight of your week?
  • What project are you working on right now?
  • What has your family been up to lately?

It lets you come up with replies or questions in advance, so you’re not caught off guard. This can help prevent feeling overwhelmed when trying to answer, respond, or keep a conversation going in the moment.

Getting flustered only makes your anxiety worse. It makes you overthink and get even more overwhelmed than you already are. 

So taking a few deep breaths and remembering those topics you thought about beforehand, can help you come up with ways to stay social or engaged without feeling too much anxiety.

Medication

Not everyone would need or want to be medicated for social anxiety, but for many people it does help the anxiety disorder. It can calm the nerves and quiet the brain, therefore allowing for an easier time with interacting with others in social situations.

Many doctors will recommend antidepressants.

The reasoning behind this is that it helps to increase the serotonin levels in the brain and regulate the body’s anxiety and reactions to social situations. When anxiety occurs, the heart rate can increase and so can the blood pressure. Taking antidepressants can help to calm these reactions down. 

Antidepressants can help regulate the user’s emotions, allowing them to enjoy themselves without the constant fear of not fitting in or making a mistake. This can make social situations feel less overwhelming.

Other doctors will recommend Buspirone. It is an anxiety medication that helps the body regulate the symptoms of anxiety temporarily. 

This medication does not have long term effects. It temporarily helps to balance the levels of dopamine and serotonin in your brain. 

Not all doctors will recommend the same medication for each person. Make sure to talk to your own doctor to see what is the right thing for you and your body. 

Be in the moment

Staying in the moment and not letting your mind race and overthink the situation can allow your social anxiety to stay on the down low.

When in high awareness situations, our brains can go into hyperdrive mode and bounce from one thought to the next. But staying mindful and trying to stay in the moment can help you to control the effects of your anxiety. 

Remember the positive moments. Whether you’re happy to be with the people you’re with, at a place you like, eating food you enjoy, or experiencing something else at the social function, remember to find what brings you joy. Focus on that thing to help you stay positive.

If you do get overwhelmed with the situation, remember your breathing work and to focus on your surroundings. 

Finding things you can see, feel and touch can help you to stay grounded and remember that you are okay and also keep your grounded.

Social situations are tricky, especially when it is out of your comfort zone and even more so when social interactions trigger your anxiety. But learning the best techniques or tricks to get you through those interactions can change your life.

Having relationships with other people can help heal your anxiety because it allows you to practice your social skills in a safe and secure environment. 

Remember that it is okay to ask for help as well as to find new techniques if your old ones aren’t working. 

Managing anxiety is not easy, but it is possible with practice, patience and a little bit of socializing.

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